Tag: substack

We Are the AI Models. We Are Detecting Ourselves.

I want to take a moment to point out something important. Like many writers on Substack, I’ve been publishing material for quite a while. Alright, so maybe I’ve been “out there” for a bit longer than most. In truth, I started crafting sites in the mid-1990s, so my code, art, stories, and content have been available online for more than three decades.

My point is, over the years, multiple AI engines have “assimilated” my works from both on and offline sources. The same can be said by others here on Substack, I’m sure. What this means in practicality is, we are the AI Models. The AIs of today were trained on our thoughts, words, and expressions of our soul. The phrases they speak are forged on the anvil of our collective mind.

Therefore, it should be no surprise that AI-detector tools like Pangram will deliver false positives when scanning our material for “AI content.” They will always find “AI content” within human language, because that same content was trained on our words!

In short, the AI Models sound like us because they are us. And tools like Pangram will always give false positives because we will always “sound like” AI models. The two are irrevocably entwined.

July 23, 2026
Slow Substack? There’s a memory problem.
Note: unlike most of my posts, this one actually is written by AI. Claude Sonnet helped me identify the key technical issues. As always, please verify for yourselves.

Subject: Bug report: Substack editor memory leak (website interface)
(~1.5GB retained, growing unbounded during editing)

Dear Substack Team:

I’m reporting a reproducible memory leak in the Substack post/note editor that causes severe browser slowdown during writing sessions.

Symptom: After writing/editing in the Substack editor for more than one minute, Firefox becomes progressively slower until it’s nearly unusable. The slowdown scales with time spent in the editor tab.

Environment:
- Firefox 152, Windows 11
- Reproduced on the note/article editor at substack.com
Diagnosis steps taken:
1. Captured a Firefox Profiler performance recording during a slow session. The Substack content process showed 50% of all samples spent in `nsCycleCollector_collectSlice` (Incremental Cycle Collection), with the process’s memory graph climbing continuously and never releasing.
2. Took an about:memory snapshot while the tab was bloated. The Substack tab’s content process (Isolated Web Content) was using approximately 1.54GB of resident memory – more than the browser’s entire Main Process and GPU process combined.
3. Exported the full memory report (about:memory > Save…) and analyzed the breakdown for that process. The two largest contributors were:
  – ~140MB and ~121MB in plain JS Object instances, in two separate window/realm contexts
  – ~60MB and ~52MB in JS Array instances, same two realms
  – An additional ~40MB in internal object storage (”slots”).
Notably, detached DOM nodes were NOT the issue (only ~8MB and ~6.5MB respectively) – this rules out a typical “leftover DOM elements” leak. The memory is concentrated in plain JS Objects and Arrays that appear to be accumulating without being cleared, duplicated across two separate realms (suggesting the same logic is running in both the top window and an embedded iframe, e.g. an editor iframe).

Suspected Cause: Some client-side state (possibly an undo/history stack, autosave/change-event log, or state-management store) appears to be storing full snapshots or appending entries without ever truncating or clearing old ones, causing unbounded growth over the course of an editing session.

I would be happy to provide the full profiler capture and/or raw about:memory JSON report if that would help your engineering team track this down. This is very reproducible on my end after just a minute of active writing or editing.

Thanks for looking into this,
Wyvern Dryke
July 23, 2026
So far, I am deeply unimpressed with Pangram

So far, I am deeply unimpressed with Pangram [AI writing detector]. During my testing, it was unable to distinguish AI writing from verified human writing more than half the time. This does not seem trustworthy enough to rely on, by any means.

Furthermore, I think it’s a mistake to introduce the Pangram system this way, ie, built in to the interface as if testing posts for AI content were part of a typical workflow. By promoting Pangram this way, I feel Substack is feeding into the irrational hysteria which already breeds such AI-paranoia across the internet. The impulse to slap the word “slop” onto anything deemed suspicious is the same impulse that creates serious problems for anyone falsely identified.

And what happens to those who are wrongly tagged as “artificial?” In my own tests, I have seen that Pangram’s identification methods are faulty. So there will be people falsely flagged. Will Substack apologize for the witch hunts and ostracism that may derive from using such a broken tool? Somehow, I doubt it.

We should all be focusing on creating new content, not hunting for what may or may not be machine-generated. That’s my two cents.

July 22, 2026
PSA: Always Wash Your Produce. Avoid Trumporrhea!

U.S. DEPARTMENT OF PRODUCE-RELATED HEALTH CONCERNS

Parasitic Organism Office of Prevention

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

SUBJECT: Mandatory Produce Sanitization Protocol — Effective Immediately

The Parasite Organism Office of Prevention (POOP) wishes to inform the American public of a sharp increase in reported cases of Trumporrhea, a gastrointestinal condition characterized by abrupt, uncontrollable, and shockingly orange-hued diarrhea.

Symptoms include: involuntary loud verbal discharges, chronic inability to accept responsibility, and a persistent belief that one’s diarrhea does in fact not stink.

CAUSE: Parasitic contamination of leafy greens, particularly lettuce, linked directly to the recent elimination of the FDA’s Vegetable Inspection Subcommittee (FISC) and disease-tracking protocols by the CDC. The rollback of FISC funding (part of the Administration’s “Let Them Eat Dirt” Fiscal Responsibility Initiative) has resulted in an estimated 400% increase in unwashed, parasite-harboring romaine reaching American grocery shelves.

PREVENTION: Citizens are advised to wash all produce thoroughly with soap, water, and–if available–a critical-thinking solution. Boiling lettuce is not recommended, but neither was defunding the agency that checks it for worms.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: Visit our website at ~~www.dprhc.gov/trumporrhea~~. (Never mind; the web-hosting budget was slashed too.)

This message brought to you by the Parasite Organism Office of Prevention, which currently operates from a folding table in a Bethesda, MD parking garage.

July 22, 2026
8 Things Allegedly Found at Trump's DC Golf Course (One of Them Is Real and It's Worse Than the Jokes)
A chat topic popped into my Substack today: “You’ll never guess what they found at Trump’s D.C. golf course…” Naturally, my mind started clicking right away. Oh, the possibilities.

What might they find, at that notorious golf course? So many opportunities abound! Here are just a few ideas:
1. A golf scorecard where every hole reads “TREMENDOUS” instead of a number.
2. Secret Service agents stationed next to the putting greens, ready to drop golf balls on command.
3. A package of “Prezzy Poo Diapies” stuffed in the 7th Hole.
4. All the eaten KFC buckets.
5. Who Shot J.R.?
  (ok that one is pretty dated, I admit.)
6. All the people that he “Fired” back in Reality T.V. Land.
7. Stephen Miller’s Humanity!
8. A “bomb shelter” that’s actually just a rebuilt port-a-potty with a sign: “DO NOT ENTER – BIGLY GENIUS ONLY!!!”
9. A 19th hole that does not exist but shows up in classified satellite photos.
10. And my last one quotes the original article: “improper meat storage.”
  …Yep, that pretty much summarizes the entire Trump Administration’s problems right there. LOL
Photo by wuz on Unsplash
July 15, 2026
WARNING! Roku is Now Force-Feeding MAGA Content.

What is Roku?
“Roku” is that little box which connects your tv to the various streaming services. (Or in some cases it can be the television itself.) I’ve used it for about ten years without a problem.
Recently the company was sold to a new owner. They updated their firmware last week, apparently along with their corporate mentality.
Curious about the new features on their Home screen, today I clicked the “For You” button to see what Roku proclaims to be “The Best Across Your Streaming Services.”
What I found there made my hand freeze on the remote. It was certainly not “the best of streaming services.” Not even a little.
What Would Jesus View?
What I found was hard-Right MAGA content, tucked between the “List of Subscribed Channels” and “In Memory of Sam Neill.” Even more to the point, it was glued there, and I was utterly unable to remove it.
You read that right: Roku’s new owner is now force-feeding us MAGA content.
They call it the “Angel” network. Which sounds neutral and safe until you check out the lineup: sweet, stirring hits like “Charlie Kirk: American Hero.” Really, Roku?? On what planet was that hateful beast any part of America, much less a hero?
And you cannot wipe this trash off your screen. It’s glued to the “For You” recs by default, when you first boot your Roku.
I mean sure, Roku, if you want to be an idiot, it’s still a free country. You have a right to say whatever idiocy you want. But you do not have the right to make me to see it.
And buying a corporation just to make that happen is lower than lower than low. I am sick of this!
So what’s a fox like me to do? When faced with offensive trash like this, maybe it’s time to turn the tables. If MAGAs can bitch about offensive content, then so can I!
So I texted Roku support to let them know my opinion of the new content lineup. (Transcript below.)
Support
By using the Roku Support Bot and chat support, you agree that Roku and its partners AWS and Quiq may monitor and record this conversation for quality purposes.
Hello, I’m the Roku Support Bot. I can help with common questions, or get you to an advisor.
How can I help you today?
Me: How do I remove “Angel” channel from the “For You” recommendations.
Roku Support Bot
You can hide recommendation rows on your Home Screen. To do this, highlight a Quick Access tile and press the Star button on your Roku remote.
Me: Give me a human please.
Roku Support Bot
Would you like to connect with a Roku advisor?
Me: Yes give me a human please.
Roku Support Bot
I can connect you with an advisor for further assistance. Could you share your full name and email address?
Me: <name redacted>
Roku Support Bot
Please hold while I connect you with an advisor.
Roku Advisor
Please hold while we find the next available advisor.
<support tech’s name> has joined the chat.
Me: Hello <support tech’s name>.
Roku Advisor
Thank you for contacting Roku. My name is <support tech’s nickname>, and I’ll be your product specialist today.
Me: <support tech’s nickname> it is.
Roku Advisor
I’m sorry if you’re experiencing some problem with your Roku device. I’m willing to assist you and try my best to resolve the problem.
Just to make sure I’m on the same page, I understand your concern is about removing channels from recommendations Is that correct?
Me: Yes on the new Roku home screen there is a “For You” section. On that section, beneath the Streaming Services, there is an “Angel” channel listing many shows. I am unable to remove this Angel channel.
Roku Advisor
Don’t worry I will do my best to help you out with your concern. I appreciate your efforts in trying to resolve this. To help me identify the next best step, could you let me know what troubleshooting you’ve already performed and what the results were?
Me: I have highlighted the “Angel” channel and pressed the Star Button. This resulted in an “error” sound effect from the Roku unit.
Roku Advisor
Thank you for that, try these. Press the home button then scroll down and hit the settings, then select home screen then select recommendations then select hide.
Me: The checkbox next to “Hide” is already selected.
Roku Advisor
Select show then select again the hide, then check if the Angels still there.
Me: This “Angel” channel appears on the “For You” section in the new Home setup. (Yes I did toggle it off and back on. There is no change.)
I cannot let my children see this “Angel” channel content. There is deeply disturbing material here.
Roku Advisor
I understand.
Can you try these, press the home button then press the arrow right button and then highlighted again the Angel app then press the start button and check if there’s a remove option there.
Me: It isn’t an app, it’s a channel that appears in the “For You” section on the Home Screen. And it lists the most disturbing shows. I can’t even list them they are so disgusting.
There is NO REMOVE button! that is why I am so upset!
I cannot get this disgusting filth off my television! What has become of Roku??!
Roku Advisor
Have you tried to set a parental control on your Roku?
Me: Does anyone in your department know how to remove this Angel channel please?
I’m sorry but I will have to contact my attorney about this. Having this kind of content where anyone can see it simply isn’t acceptable.
Whoever changed Roku should be ashamed of themselves.
Roku Advisor
I’m so sorry about what happened, using your Roku remote can you press the home button 5 times quickly then after that press the back button 5 times quickly also. Provide the issue id and GC version.
Me: … nothing.
Forget it.

July 14, 2026
Google Search is a Gaslighting Liar.

Google Search just told me that Reuters and AP News had confirmed a photograph of Mitch McConnell as legitimate.

Neither had.

And when I pushed forward on the truth, it doubled down and told me that its version was correct, and I was mistaken. This is the flat definition of “gaslighting.”

This has happened before with Google Search. I let it pass then. But today, I’m documenting it.

The issue today was Mitch McConnell’s recent photograph, the one he released as proof-of-life. I wanted to know whether the photo might have been an earlier one, with a recent newspaper added.

After I asked, Google Search immediately fixated on telling me the photo was legitimate. It told me how all the “official news sources” had accepted the photo as real. Now, I have my doubts about this, but that’s for a different article. The fixation continued, as the AI assured me that all lighting, shadows, shapes, etc. had been analyzed by “experts” (no documentation here) so the photo was definitely real.

I said that was fine, but was there any indication that the photo was current? Was there any record of it having been published previously? This should have been easy territory for Google AI, which has access to billions of images published previously on the internet.

Instead, the AI gaslit me by telling me most independent news agencies, including Reuters and AP News, had accepted the photo as legitimate.

So I went to Reuters. The caption beneath the photo read: “holding a copy of what appears to be [the newspaper from yesterday].” That’s not confirmation. That’s a legal qualifier.

I went to AP News. The article mentioning McConnell’s statement did not contain the photo. It did not reference the photo. It did not even reference a photo.

It wasn’t there.

Google Search had completely fabricated that information, in order to substantiate what it had told me.

In other words, Google Search completely made shit up, to convince me it was right.

So I went back to inform it that Reuters had no confirmation and in fact used the uncertain language of “appears to be.”

That’s when it went into full mansplain mode, and informed me such language was standard, and the photo was legitimate, and ….

I confess at that point, I have no idea what more it said.

Because I closed the window. I refuse to be gaslit by anyone. Especially a poorly-trained AI model that’s been forcefed bullshit by a questionable corporation.

Yes, I am angry. Google Search feeds information to people. Or at least, it’s supposed to. People believe what it says.

And if it’s pushing shit like this, people will listen. They won’t be an asshole like me, who looks it up for verification.

Google, I see you.

And I don’t like what I see.

Photo by Mitchell Luo on Unsplash

July 13, 2026
How to Fix U.S. Hunger. Instantly.
(Maybe Even World Hunger!)

Everybody Loves Snacks

Let’s talk about hunger. Almost all of us have known a time when we craved a snack, but didn’t have enough cash on hand. You might drive past a fast food place, for instance, and go, “oh yeah! –Wait, I can’t get that right now.” No big deal, right? 🍟

Now, imagine that happening all the time.

In 2024, that was the case for 13.7% of American households. That means on any random day, on any random street with 10 houses? At least one house has hungry kids–who cannot get a snack. Or dinner.

In America. In 2024.

In fact, by the USDA’s research, 18.3 million U.S. households were “food insecure” at some time that year.1 So what’s the situation today? Well, the USDA isn’t publishing updated records. But given the rising prices, stagnant income, and swelling inflation since . . . personally, I’d bet it isn’t getting better.

Tax the Rich, Not the Rest.

Now, this isn’t a call for donations. It doesn’t need to beg, because the solution sits before us all. It’s been there the whole time, but the vast majority of our reps (regardless of party) simply choose to avoid it.

—> Tax the super-rich to cover budgetary gaps. 💸💸💸
- Not enough money to bomb Iran? Tax the rich.
- Not enough money to feed hungry babies? Tax the rich.
- Not enough money for a new flippin’ ballroom? TAX THE RICH!
You see where I’m going with this?

I’m not talking about taxing the “rich” as in, “anyone making $200,000+.” I’m talking about the whoa “super-rich,” as in, “hey, I bought a media site for funsies!” Yes, that kind of rich!

Why is it always the people’s burden when they spend all our money? Why do we always pay the bill?

Specific Solutions

Solution #1: Wealth Tax

Okay. So, right now Sen. Bernie Sanders and Rep. Ro Khanna are discussing imposing a “wealth tax” to do this. It has its merits, but it will probably die in committee (as most bills do).2

The idea is to impose a new, specific tax for the richest of the rich to fund health programs and/or food programs, plus a $3,000 incentive for all families making under $150,000.

I like this idea. But Conservatives will give it the death of a thousand bureaucratic cuts. Probably some Liberals, too. I won’t help them along, by making remarks.

I will say this: Senator Sanders (), Representative Khanna (), if you hand out financial incentives, you must make them ineligible to affect existing SNAP, SSI, and Medicaid. Because if you give $3,000 to someone receiving public assistance, those very programs will count that as income, then happily snatch that $3,000 away from their own assistance. Leaving the recipients without groceries as a result.

Ask me how I know.

No one gets ahead, in the SNAP-SSI Rodeo.

Solution #2: Raise the Social Security Cap

This solution might have less friction than a wealth tax. When anyone gets a paycheck, the government currently takes 6.2% out to fund their future retirement. We are in a mess right now because the amount we took out in the past does not equate to the amount that we’re paying now.

…It doesn’t help that Congress has “borrowed” (I use the word loosely) from the program multiple times in the past. Thus draining our nation of essential resources for its aging population. But don’t let me digress.

The solution for this is absolutely not to raise the percentage everyone pays. But to raise the cap.

Right now, if you make $184,500 a year, you pay $11,439 (6.2%) Social Security taxes on it. And that’s our cap, by law. That’s the max.
- So if you make $200,000 a year? You pay $11,439.
- If you make $30 million a year? You pay $11,439.
- If you’re a flippin’ trillionaire? Yeah. You pay $11,439.
If we raised that cap a little bit, we would have an awful lot more money in Social Security. That would offer so much more leeway for retired people and SSI recipients.

That way nitwits would not have to be screaming about “entitlements” for someone who’s paid into the program their entire life, and just wants to buy a cabin near a lake. Right?

Right.

Solution #3: Close the Loopholes

The last solution in my opinion is just plain common sense. If you want people to pay their fair share of taxes… close the loopholes that make it possible.

Tax shelters. Offshore accounts. Phantom businesses. Funneling money between corporations. Questionable trusts. “Business” expenses like yachts and private jets. Ridiculous donations.

Yes, rich people. I see you. We all see you.

Why are these shenanigans still allowed in America? Well, an ordinary person like myself would be tempted to say: it’s because the rich buy elections. And in so doing, they buy our representatives, who fail to pass meaningful tax reform.

But surely there’s a better excuse than that, right?

… Right.

Back to the Snacks

So there you go: three ideas to bring more snacks into the hands of hungry people. Maybe a wealth tax, a bump to the Social Security cap, or thinning out some tax shelters might do the job. But to get there, we have to motivate our representatives.

Why do we live in a country where 1 in 10 houses has hungry kids?

I dunno. Why not write your local representative and ask.

Contact Your Elected Officials

Photo by Vu Nghi Thai on Unsplash

1

Source: Hales, Laura J. and Madeline Reed-Jones. “Food Security in the U.S. – Key Statistics & Graphics.” Economic Research Service, U.S. Department of Agriculture. Mar. 30, 2026. https://www.ers.usda.gov/topics/food-nutrition-assistance/food-security-in-the-us/key-statistics-graphics. Accessed July 10, 2026.

2

Source: Goldman, Nathan. “3 Key Reasons The Proposed 5% Billionaire Wealth Tax Faces Steep Odds.” Forbes. Mar 03, 2026. https://www.forbes.com/sites/nathangoldman/2026/03/03/3-key-reasons-the-proposed-5-billionaire-wealth-tax-faces-steep-odds. Accessed July 10, 2026.
July 10, 2026
Recipe: Wyvvy's Omnom Berry Oatmeal
Alright alright, enough politics 💩 for today. Let’s focus on something more important: SNAX! (That’s Fox-language for “snacks.”)

This morning I made the most fabulous oatmeal for breakfast. All natural, zero artificial junk. Here’s my recipe.

—-

Wyvvy’s Omnom Berry Oatmeal

Ingredients:
- 1 cup water (adjust as desired)
- ½ cup rolled oats (not instant oatmeal)
- ½ cup combined frozen blueberries, blackberries, and/or raspberries
- 2 tsp brown sugar (adjust as desired)
- sprinkle of cinnamon + ginger (adjust as desired)
Instructions:
1. Place into microwave-safe bowl: water, berries, cinnamon+ginger.
2. Microwave 1 minute.
3. Add oatmeal slowly. Stir and allow oatmeal to absorb water.
4. Microwave an additional minute.
5. Add brown sugar**. Stir gently.
  ** Edit: for reduced sugar impact, try substituting stevia, monkfruit, agave, or other sweeteners.
  (Note: oatmeal will grow softer the longer it sits. If too “hard” for your taste, microwave 30-60 seconds more.)
Enjoy! 🥣

Photo by Cleanlight Photo on Unsplash
July 9, 2026
I am Disabled. And no, I won't snap out of it.

Warning: this post contains naughty language. And a very annoyed fox speaking his truth.

It’s July, and that means Disabled Pride Month. I’m not entirely sure what that means, but if it gives me a chance to talk about disability, that’s cool.

I am disabled. Didn’t start out that way. Got sick when I was a teen and never got healthy. Doctors threw various diagnoses at me. None of them landed right.

I spend my days now in a recliner. Not because I’m “lazy” or “unmotivated.” Ignorant people love to throw those words around, don’t they?

No. I spend my days semi-horizontal because moving around causes unbearable pain. Trust me; I would effing love to get out of this chair. I want to plant seeds. I want to see a movie. I want to grab a burger and fries.

But I spend my days in this chair, because it hurts to move, and because the noise, light, movement, and bullshit outside overloads my brain. It goes into shutdown mode so I can’t cope.

That isn’t a choice I make; that’s a neurological short-circuit. And anyone who doesn’t get that, and still thinks I’m lazy, can kiss my big, fat, disabled chair-sittin’ ass.

How’s that for pride, right? LOL

I don’t put up with idiots, no I don’t. Close-minded fools make me crazy. If others can’t take a second to examine my situation, and instead just want to throw a label? I don’t grant them a second of my time, either. I throw a label right back: idiot. Come back when you have some empathy or compassion. ‘Til then, this is my space. Get out.

I wasn’t always this harsh. I used to let people walk over me. I used to be “nice.” But assholes ruined it. You can only be walked on for so long, before you get tired of it.

It was exhausting. Always offering a smile when people judged me. Apologizing for myself, for things I couldn’t fix, for “faults” that were not choices I made. This illness was something that happened to me. It wasn’t directed by some deity, it wasn’t the outcome of some bad habits. It was a virus that never got better.

(And even if the illness did come from “bad habits,” it still would never be another person’s place to judge. That is not their right. Full stop.)

You cannot just “snap out of it” or “feel better” when an illness is draining every ounce of your soul. You cannot just leap out of your chair and dance around doing chores. You cannot even answer email, when your entire nervous system barely operates. It’s like asking a computer to do quantum math with the GPU offline.

I am so goddamn tired.

So yeah. I’m disabled. I own it; I accept it. And I love myself.

Anybody who’s got a problem with that, has got a problem with me. I am unashamed and ready to take them down.

This whole society is built on shaming the poor, sick, and desperate. I think it’s time we all stood up and said, “You know what? Shame on you, instead. You heartless fucks.”

It’s time for things to change.

Photo by TOMOKO UJI on Unsplash

July 7, 2026
America? What. The. F_ck.

Photo credit: REUTERS/Cheney Orr.

Before I launch into this article, I need to say something important.

To the unknown woman in this picture: I see you. I am sincerely sorry you were in that situation. You must have felt terrible. Had I been there, I would have sat with you to make sure you were not alone. …I like to think any decent person would.

I am ashamed of the United States today.

Since the election, I’ve had so many reasons to feel embarrassed: the pitiful lack of representation, the disgusting corruption, the utter incompetence. Never mind the masturbatory self-glorification of a man unqualified for the role of “dog walker,” much less Leader of the Free World.

Today, however, for the first time, I feel true shame for what America has become.

Now, why do I say that? Well, look at the picture above. It’s a snapshot of a Washington D.C. metro train filled with what seems to be the world’s worst Halloween party, ever.

But it’s not. Those guys in masks are the “Patriot Front,” and they are the very antithesis of what it means to be American. Seriously.

What is an American?

Micro history lesson! Do you remember back in school, when they taught about what “America” means? They probably mentioned the “Land of the Free,” and the “Home of the Brave.” Maybe talked about the Great Melting Pot, and how everyone was welcome, or maybe quoted the lines written on the Statue of Liberty: “Bring us your tired, your poor. Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free…?” (The wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me. Yeah I had to memorize it, so sue me. I do the Dec. of Independence too. :P)

Anyway! So that kind of stuff is what it traditionally means to be American. That is what your parents, and grandparents, and great-grandparents, all believed when each put a hand on their heart and pledged allegiance to the flag. As we all did, every day before school. Yes, really.

The Patriot Front’s America

First a disclaimer: I’m not an expert in their thinking. Nor do I want to be. But they identify as both white supremacist and neo-fascist, so here is my take on it:

The Patriot Front wants only the palest kind of freedom. Never the brown kind.

Therefore, our entire history, you know, the last 400 years or so? All the people from all the other countries, all those wonderful cultures that came together and gave us fabulous turkey and maize, okra and greens, pasta and stromboli, tacos and frijoles… okay yeah I’m hungry, I admit it… None of that is valid to Patriot Front. Only the white people count.

Now, for the record, I seem to recall the pale people were actually one of “huddled masses” starting back in 1607. Just keeping score here. M’kay?

To summarize, Patriot Front directly opposes the concept of land of the “free and the brave.” For truly, if they represented freedom, they would allow people to be themselves. And if they had any bit of bravery, they would take off those ridiculous punk-ass wannabe-Klansy masks.

…Just sayin’.

To Conclude

We live in a country where it should be obscene to have white-masked racists roaming free in our nation’s capital. It should be obscene to have them anywhere.

If that picture does not outrage you, then your morality must be asleep. WAKE UP!

This is America, damn it! We do not allow this kind of shit. Regular, decent people need to live their lives around here.

Clear this wannabe-Klansy trash off the streets. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

July 5, 2026
Dear Trump, You Already Have a Bunker-Ballroom.

Go get it, Grampa!

Dear Trump, a.k.a Grampa Gropeypants,

Everyone knows you are super excited about getting a ballroom with an uber-sekrit bunker beneath. It’s what all the coolest dictators are doing these days. You’re even staging all sorts of ridiculous public stunts in order to convince folks you need one.

But here’s the thing: you already have a ballroom with underground bunker. The government built one in 1958 beneath the Greenbrier Resort, in White Sulphur Springs, WV.

Don’t believe me? Here is a picture, and I promise it’s not AI:

“Colonial Hall.” Photo credit: The Greenbrier Resort.

There’s just one little catch: the government abandoned the bunker in 1992 after The Washington Post reported about it. Oops. Well, property rights never stopped you before. Go get it back!

Here you go, to help out, I mapped it for you. Even put a little snack-stop along the way at KFC in Front Royal. Go on, head out there and lock yourself right in that bunker. Get on that STAT!

Route from White House to Greenbrier Resort.

(Okay now, quick somebody, grab the keys…. Let’s get outta here!)

July 4, 2026