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Tag: Elon Musk

  • Musk is Not a Trillionaire. It's Imaginary Money.

    Musk is Not a Trillionaire. It's Imaginary Money.

    This is a silly article that tries to make a somewhat-serious point: everyone’s shouting how Musk is a trillionaire, but no one’s examining what an illusionary concept that really means. We might as well call him any silly name. And I have one in mind. I posted this on Substack in early 2026.
    ~FloxMonster™, July 20, 2026

    Elon Musk
    Image Credit: Gage Skidmore. License: Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 International. My alterations: square crop, blur of everyone but subject, addition of words, sparkles, and a moderately inappropriate fruit.

    Musk is Not a Trillionaire. It’s Imaginary Money.

    Sorry all you Musk fans (if any still exist), but he is NOT really a “trillionaire.” I know the media love to say it, but no, he’s actually… really not.

    In fact, you might as well make up any other title to give him, like “Abracadildodaire.” (My personal favorite.) Because Musk does not possess one trillion dollars. Nope. Nobody handed him a big chest full of dollars. No one ever will.

    Go straight to jail, do not pass “Go,” do not collect one trillion dollars.

    So why do they call him a Trillionaire?

    Why do they call him that? Well, first the obvious reason: it makes great headlines. Everyone will click and gush, “omagah he’s a trillionaire! … Wait, what’s a trillionaire.”

    Exactly. What’s a trillionaire?

    About the same thing as an Abracadildodaire.

    The media call him a “trillionaire” because he owns a lot of property (stock) that, on a good day, if he were to sell it, would be valued at its current price around one trillion dollars. Here’s the catch: he will not sell that. Because if he did, he would no longer own those companies.

    So in truth, he owns an idea that is theoretically worth… whatever the market says… if he ever were to cash out… which he won’t.

    Yeah.

    Also, Money is Fake.

    I’m just going to toss this one in because I like to repeat myself: money is fake. Dollars are only worth what rich people and the government tell us it is. Seriously. We haven’t had a real basis for our money in decades.

    There isn’t any gold behind a dollar. There hasn’t been since April 20, 1933. We’re coming up on a century with completely fabricated, imaginary basis for our currency.

    Money is literally whatever they tell us it’s worth. Because they say so. No other basis. No other value.

    .

    So yeah. We might as well call Musk an Abracadildodaire. That’s actually what a “trillionaire” is worth.